Finding Balance: How Writing My Novel ‘CONTRAST’ Helped Me Find My Purpose
Eight years I’ve been working on my novel CONTRAST (to be published on February 6!). Eight transformative years that feel like a lifetime. The book represents that for me; a lifetime of lessons and frustrations and everything I’ve always wanted to express but was never able to find the right medium for.
Lord knows I’ve tried though! Many of you have seen me do so over the past 17 years. Teaching yoga, all my work around ‘meaningful relations’, the ‘How is it to be you?’ project with the mini-documentaries and portraits. I even semi-secretly worked on the thought experiment ‘How to make world peace possible?’
It’s not unlikely that you’ve found me naive and delusional at times…it’s fine, I sometimes was :)
What drove me was always the same: my constant struggle to find meaning in this seemingly absurd existence of ours.
What is meaningful about the loss of life of many for the sake of the ego of only a few? What is meaningful about the fact that so many people treat others as if they were less than them? And yet, there’s beauty too. Of course there is, and so much of it. But how can we reconcile and celebrate the beauty of life when the negative seems to outweigh and crush it so very often? It’s the contrast between these truths, between the love and the hate that I’ve never been able to make sense of.
I know that there are logical explanations for all of this. I have enough knowledge of the workings of the human psyche and the world to understand that this is ‘how it is’. But that doesn’t mean I’m in any way capable, or willing, to understand or accept on a heart and soul level. In fact, it’s this exact thing that has always made me feel detached from this world. Humanity even. Call it a karmic trauma response (or whatever) but I’ve never been able to feel at home in a world where all this was true.
So all this had been boiling underneath the surface when the idea for the novel hit me like lightning during an extraordinarily beautiful sunset on the island of Lesvos, Greece back in 2016. Everything fell into place.
A story. Two neighbors, man and woman, and opposites in every other way. Their houses are set on a circular plot of land with a curved wall in the middle. A circular patch of concrete had come into existence in her garden. One of wildflowers in his. Only the birds flying over will see the resemblance with a yin-yang symbol. And though I didn’t yet know what role they would play, there had to be a ghost in there too…somehow (spoiler alert, the ghost ended up being my leading man and most favorite character of all literary times).
The whole idea was so immediate and clear that there was zero mistake that I had to write this book no matter what. So in the past 8 years, I did just that. This is a book about finding balance in the contrasts of life. Of understanding that pain, in all its forms, is part of human existence as much as joy and love are. And that meaning is to be found in the acceptance of this fact. It took me 8 years and 67.000 words to get there but what I learned was that ‘to grieve is to love, and to love is the purpose.’
'CONTRAST' is not just a novel; it is my ode to the resilience of the human spirit, a reminder that even in the midst of life's frictions, there is always hope and healing. It is my hope that this book will resonate with those who also struggle with all that comes with being human and find comfort in its message of acceptance, compassion, and love.
In the next few posts, I’ll dive deeper into the novel's story, themes, and how it can guide you on your own path of self-discovery and meaning. For now, I would simply like to thank you for having been part of this life-altering journey, without you, I would not be me!
Buy CONTRAST; a novel
What others have said about CONTRAST:
“The book’s dreamlike quality and slow drizzle of information make for a compelling read. A haunting novel of forgotten traumas and restorative friendships.”
- Kirkus Reviews
Thoughtful, surprising existential adventure between life and death.
“Coussement debuts with a searching speculative drama about the meaning of life and death and how emotional wounds from our past affect our future. [While] very much a novel of the mind, Coussement’s style allows readers to feel like they are hanging out with familiar friends, somewhere between this world and the beyond.”
Production grade (incl. editing): A
- Publishers Weekly Booklife Reviews
“A profound exploration of humanity, the meaning of life, and the possibilities that lie beyond death's veil.”
- Chelsea Tucker, Independent Book Review
